*Checks supplies *

your cart is empty

Hmm, I was so concerned with stockpiling non-perishable foods that I never thought to stock up on random things.

*Goes online. Adds a random assortment of things to the cart. Excedrin. Aluminum foil. Deodorant. Toothpaste. Wasp spray.*

Cart message: “Some of your items require a minimum order value.”

Ok, fine.

*Adds a bag of trail mix to hit the order minimum*

*5 days later, in the middle of the night*

“Your order has shipped! Sorry, some of the items in your order were not available.”

Shipment includes: trail mix.

That’s it. The one thing you don’t need is the one thing you get.

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